Ell-E Gee round 2 at London's O2 Arena... More Etherealness, More Party Petrol and More Centre Stage #moreismore

The Real Queen G

For my many many regular readers (and by that I mean all 0 of you) you will know that I went to see Ellie Lifegoals Goulding live in Newcastle on Wednesday the 16th of March and it was a truly celestial experience... The closest I've felt to heaven in my whole 21 years thus far!  Well B and I had such an incredible time that the day after we returned to Edinburgh, work and our drab reality we decided to blow all of our savings and book to go see Ellie for a second time in London.  As you can probably predict, both from the beginning of this post and from it's title, this post is dedicated to our second, and sadly final, attendance of the Delirium World Tour.

Wednesday 23 March 2016

I spent the day working a 12 hour shift and then returned to my flat at 8.30/9pm.  I messaged B to come through to my room so we could discuss the final plans for the next day (Goulding day) and so she came through, poster making supplies in hand, and we came to the sad realization that it would be a 4am wake up call for us the next day.  B and I had a quick catch up and then got down to business making posters for the concert, it was sheer carnage as glitter, super glue and black marker got everywhere but ultimately we ended up with 3 wonderful pieces of artwork and one John Newman appreciation poster.  

What are you some kind of artist or
something?

The posters read:

1. I've got Ellie On My Mind
2. Ellie's got that Fire Fire FiiiiiIIiiire
3. Ellie is Gould-en, she makes us Delirious 
4. John, I need to know now, know now will you Love Me?   

As you can probably tell we are hella original and I'm 100% sure nobody has thought of those phrases to put on their posters before, 100%!  The whole process took a while and before we knew it the clock stuck 12 and we had to accept that it was bed time.  I was so excited i didn't think that I would be able to sleep but in the end the 12 hour shifts caught up with me and I was in a deep slumber the second my head hit the pillow.

Thursday 24 March 2016

Too soon?

4am and my alarm sounds... "Come on Jessica, come on Tori, let's go to the mall you wont be sorry" as Robin Sparkles welcomes me into the day.  Everything hurt and I was dying, I knew that I was getting out of bed for a good cause, a great cause even but it was just so damn early!  As the blinding pain of exhaustion hit I thought of what Ellie would say, "Bite down on your lip, take another sip, dont panic!"  and just like that I was buzzing for the wonderful life making event that was mere hours away from me.  B and I reconvened in the hall and I told her about how I couldn't get Don't Panic out of my head, just like that "bite down on your lip, take another sip, don't panic" became the saying/song of the trip.  We set out for the tram and as we waited we discussed matters such as the UK early 2000 trend of listening to high pitched DJ music #DJCammyInTheMix2k6 and other equally interesting subjects and then we were en route to the airport.  It was 6.30am by the time we cleared security and I insisted on visiting the whiz palace before boarding the plane because airplane bathrooms are ew.  B was getting worried because our boarding time was 6.30 and she thought we were going to miss the plane, we had a slight difference of opinions as to whi

ch gate we were boarding from and then we decided to listen to me because I am always right when it comes to directions.  I was wrong.  After humiliating us by trying to board the wrong plane we set out towards the actual gate, B almost in a run for fear of missing the plane and myself trying to connect the the wifi in order to snapchat B saying "Bite down on your lip, take another sip".  We made it in time for our flight and before we knew it we were off, up in the air, on our way to see Ellie.

The flight was spent listening to music, chatting and then writing a letter each to Ellie, the 02 arena website stated that there was an information desk where you could hand in letters to singers and this was not an opportunity we were willing to miss.  My Letter went a little like this I (give or take the wording of the first section):

Dear Ellie,

I am currently on a flight from Edinburgh to London with my main man Beth to see your Delirium tour for a second time and I am so excited.  Although this is my second time seeing the Delirium tour it will be the 5th time I have seen you live.  I also seen you at T in the Park in the King Tut's tend many moons ago, at the 02ABC in Glasgow for Halcyon, at Hyde Park for the British Summertime Festival and now Delirium twice...(more ramblings)... 

To sum up what I really want to say is that if you were Harry Potter then I would want to be your invisibility cloak so that I could shelter you from all of the worlds evils.  If I was a 2 horned unicorn and you were a horse I would give up one of my horns for you.  If I was Dr Meredith Grey and you were a patient who was coding then I would for sure push one of epi for you!  Here is a joke:  2 fish are in a tank, one fish turns to the other and says "do you know how to drive this thing?" haha love Gemma *inster twitter account name here* xoxo

legs for days

We arrived in London and I practiced my English accent and we made our way into the city centre.  I wont go into how we spent the first part of our day before we could check into our hostel because I will write a separate London post so let skip forward to 2pm, check in time at the hostel.  We walked in circles in the rain for a dogs age before finding the hostel and I must say the 4 hours sleep almost got the better of me when I almost went off on one at B... I had to remidn myself to bite down on my lip and take another sip!  I had to continue to remind myself to do this after arriving at the hostel as the man on reception had no idea what he was doing and took forever and a day to check us in.  B and I raced to our dorm and began to get ready for Ellie as quickly as we could after the delay at reception!  I was ready before B so I grabbed my straighteners and began to use them to curl one side of her hair as she tackled the other.  As I came across a knot in her hair I began trying to juggle my tangle teezer, straighteners and B's hair between my two hands which ultimately resulted in

my straighteners bouncing back onto my arm and leaving a massive burn (burn burn burn gonna let it burn burn burn).  There was no time to nurse the wound and I grabbed the essentials: purse, phone, ipod, wireless charger, happy thoughts and a pocket full of sunshine before skipping to the underground for a one way trip to the one of the most amazing experiences of my life.  

"still pee but run"
"Actually run now!"

We arrive at the 02 by 3ish and claimed our spots in the line.  There were already a fair amount of people waiting to see Ellie and I was a little nervous about our chances of getting the exact spot we had been dreaming of for the past week but once again I bit down on my lip and took another sip.  B and I had 3 and a half hours to kill in the line and so after we had our spot I sent B on a one woman mission to get snacks and boy did she deliver... B got us salt and vinegar crisps, diet soda, cream eggs, cereal bar and a magazine.  Around 5pm I took my turn of leaving the line for a final pre-Ellie bathroom break, I climbed over all of the people behind us in the queue who were obviously at least just a little bit less fans of Ellie than us and as I made my way to the bathroom I passed a bar that was playing the Delirium album on a loop.  I. WAS. SO. FREAKIN. HYPED!  I returned to the line and then B left of her turn emptying her bladder.  While B was away I listened to Ellie on my ipod until the line, which consisted of fans sitting on the cold hard ground, raised to their feet and I instantly sent B 5000 Milliom texts requesting that she return to the queue immediately.  She ran back from the toilets and then we had another hour to wait until the gates actually opened... lolgoodtimes.  

We made it into the London Snapchat
Story

The gates opened at 6.30 and before we knew it we were in, we had exchanged our tickets for orange wrist bands and we had handed over our letters for Ellie to a woman who promised she would try to get them backstage to her (I may never know if Ellie actually received them or not).  The next hurdle was bag check, just our luck for B and I to be stuck behind someone who took ages to get checked.  B swapped lines and then I got through and she was delayed again, a bunch of people who had been behind us got in first but it was fine because B and I got in there to the exact spots we wanted (slightly behind the people at the barrier rather than actually at the barrier but not a bad achievement nonetheless and still the best spots in the house imo).  The only issue was we were stood behind 2 girls that very quickly became me new enemies, so much so that they put me off buy a Delirium beanie because I didn't want to be associated with them.  To sum up they took up so much space with their elbows, they just stood there, didn't dance, didn't sing.  I put my hand on the barrier for support in between acts and she shoved me back out of the way ugh just the worst.

So 6.30 turned to 7pm and Lany graced the stage.  The hair was still a mop and the confidence was still 0/10 but I have to say as Lany sang their hearts out they won over mines.  The slow song was still sleep inducing and I was a little pissed off on behalf of the guitarist when the lead singer told the crowed that "this guy (the drummer) is my very best friend!" and failed to acknowledge the third and equally as important member of their little group.  Lany stepped it up from Newcastle though and I wish them well on their journey from unknown to slightly less unknown band.  I officially added 3 of their songs to my spotify playlist, I'm feeling their music rn. They sang until 7.30 and then they stepped of the stage never to be heard of again jokes I'm a huge fan no hate all the best lads.

Hey John

7.30 turned to 8pm and and John bounced out looking alive and slightly less like he was buzzed on ecstasy than he had in Newcastle.  Somehow this was my third time seeing John live, I guess you could call me a big fan...He sand all of his best songs: Come and get it (ahnanananaohh), Tiring Game Tarrengale, Cheating, Blame It On The Night, Not Giving In and others.  As he did in Newcastle John finished with Love Me Again ft a walk through the crowed and B lost her mind (see this video: https://youtu.be/buxApIT42gA).  I will admit that when the gruesome twosome on front of us leaped forward to touch John I did try to claim a space at the barrier beside them but then when they came back I slipper back behind them for fear of being killed by murder after the show.  John put on such a great performance I really love him now such a great performer!  He left the stage at 8.30pm.

8.30 turned to 9pm and the lights dropped as the beautiful harmonies from Intro (Delirium) begin to play.  I freak the fuck out and B can't stop saying OMG.  The beginning video transitions of Ellie's face were amazing and as the intro ends and blends into Aftertaste I know Ellie is only seconds away from appearing right there on the stage on front of me.  The first few songs were sang, each one amazing.  Aftertaste will forever take me back to the moment Ellie first appears on the stage, the first song she sings.  Something In The Way You Move (which I hope does well in the charts) had an amazing dance routine and Goodness Gracious has always been a fave of mine, she really got into it by the end and hit some amazing notes!  

The concert was completely amazing, Ellie stopped to talk to the crowed and, like in Newcastle, she did explain to the crowed that she had water and party petrol on stage with her.  Unlike in Newcastle the crowd did not request Ellie down the party petrol and in London after Ellie said she had water on stage with her she did the most adorable little giggle I ever did hear (which sadly was drowned out a bit by the crowds adoring cheers and laughs in the video I took).  As she knelt on the catwalk and began explosions I was prepared, I knew she was about to make her way straight down the catwalk to me.  

Angel in every way

Ellie abso killed Explosions, hitting every note out of the park and then she stood up and walked onto stage in her knew 'Ellie-proof' dress which she explained was a but short so she wouldn't trip over it.  The first song she sand on the mini stage was How Long Will I Love You and it was so beautiful (Link to video:https://youtu.be/nn403IKVEQ0 ).  After HLWIL ended with her singing "as long as stars are above you, and longer if I may" she stated "to be fair that is a realy long time" and then she stopped to talk to the crowed.  She talked about how fun but scary it was being on the mini stage because it mean she was "in us" and then she realised that a fan in the crowed has just gotten engaged during HLWIL which she thought was amazing, "aw it is that kind of song isn't it!" and she went on to say "Everybody's getting bloddy married!" she asked the girl how she was feeling and if she saw it coming and then she said she was feeling very emotional so she better just get back to singing.  Finally she asked "Anybody else getting married tonight?" to which B responded, quite loud and desperately "I WISH!" (https://youtu.be/KXRgOkDHuWE see full thing here).  She went on to sing Army (watch video here and note her adorable smile at the start of it:https://youtu.be/q3wFEOt-9dI ) and then they rest of the show went on.  The whole show was breathtaking and just too good for words and just everything else complimentary that I said about the show in Newcastle x100000000.  She asked everyone to put their phones away while she sang burn and it was involuntary, like she had a power over all of us and we couldn't help but put the Iphones away for even just one song.  

Ellie is such an amazing talent and she is so beautiful and the definition of goals, I mean someone get that girl a frame because she belongs in the Louvre #workofart.  Which leads me nicely into a future post of mine that I will be working on shortly about my week as a Vegan (which I am currently on day 2 of in hopes of feeling harder, better, faster, stronger and all in all a little more Ellie).  I would gladly go see Ellie again, not the UK delirium tour because I have seen it twice now and I'm not made of money but I cant wait to see clips from the next stages of her tour (even though I know Ellie prefers people to watch her rather than film her at concerts) and after she has taken her break from music after this tour I'll be front row at her next one waving my hands in the air like I just don't care.  One day I hope to attend a concert that goes on all day and all night (with reasonable breaks for Ellie of course) where she just sings every one of her songs to me, maybe Taylor Swift can come too and they can swap about with one another during breaks.

Hey Ellie

Anyway, after the concert B and I went to the bar that was playing Delirium and had a brief dance about before accepting that we had to leave the o2 arena.  We went back to the hostel to look at our picks and I was very unsociable (perhaps even a little rude) with anyone that tried to talk to me because I just wanted to bask in Ellie.  The next day we returned to the O2 arena because we do what we love and we love what we do.  We did some cool stuff which I'll talk about in the London post and then we ended up in the "Chill/refreshments room" (which I dubbed the Ellie Goulding room) at the Nissan Innovation experience place which was like an out of body experience.  As we stepped in they were playing all of Ellie's music videos on loads of screens, there was a table set up like one in a dressing room and it was like stepping out of the real world into our very own Ellie Goulding-esqu paradise heaven.  We stayed there for a while and then as we left I said a final farewell to the o2 arena and it's weird and wonderful temporary Ellie-centric world.

Finally, on the train home we were more than just delirious from exhaustion.  B and I played Ellie Goudling/Delirium tour/Our trips to see Ellie themed hangman and pictionary, probably too loudly for the other passengers at times.  I was so content.  When we got back to the flat it was like back to reality whoop there goes gravity and it was really hard to believe everything that had happened Ellie related over the past week had actually happened.  As I said the o2 was like another world dedicated entirely to her and it was magical and celestial and as ethereal as the woman herself but it just didn't feel real.

I dont know if I'll ever feel like that again, it truly was a strange yet perfect experience.

The moral of the story is in times of trouble bite down on your lip, take another sip and DONT PANIC!

classic G collage

xoxo 

Queen G.

Things I'm lovin' To Watch Right Now

Good morrow fair gentles...  It has come to my attention that in my previous blog post I was sorely mistaken when I stated that I would be back in the blogisphere on the reg.  There are two good reasons that I have not been blogging it up down on the tennis court like yeah, yeah:

1. I have been super busy with university (ugh lame)
2. I have done roughly 0 blog worthy things since I last blogged (Actually since the summer hahahaha its funny because its true, my life sucks hahaha laugh through the pain.

The rumors are true... I'm back

So anyway, I decided that in keeping with the 2016 tradition of the world giving people what they want (Leo got his Oscar, the cast of friends had a reunion of sorts, cats continued to exist and the existence of mermaids was confirmed -lol jk mermaids arent real or at least thats what the government want us to believe!) I have decided to return to the 21st century type writer and chronicle my life again - this will also be a great assistance to the forward thinking being that decides to write my biography.

Tbh a lot of the things that I'm loving right now are fairly similar to the things I was lovin in October because like an dolphin I am also a creature of habit - dolphins are undoubtable creatures of habit because for the past 400 years there has not been one report of a dolphin choosing to leave his or her comfort zone, the ocean, for a life on the land.  Silly little vegan sharks, bless em!  And since I haven't really done much of interest as of late I narrow this post down to things that I am loving to view right now.

So without further ado here are the things that I am loving to watch right now...

TV

1. Some opening thoughts on Netflix

I can only assume she is talking about Netflix UK

Netflix continues to be a big part of my life, however; there is no doubting that the way the head honchos over at the Netflix headquarters abnegate us Brits of all of the best TV shows is sheer tyranny.  Sure they like to tease us a little, make us feel appreciated and special but Netfix are 100% corporate fuckboys!  They find give us How I Met Your Mother, How To Get Away With Murder, The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt and (for any poor people who have not been able to escape the trainwreck that this show has become) they gave us Pretty Little Liars too.  We see their offering and even though we know they have so much more to give we decide to commit, maybe we can change them!  We decide to sign up for the month free trial which is basically the TV subscription of a date and then afterwards we agree to pay £6 a month but... the next thing you know you are sitting there waiting for them to update their TV show selection feeling like you slept with them and they never called you back, you feel cheated and used #classicfuckboys.  Eventually you accept that this is just how things are but you can't cancel the subscription just in case one day they decide to give you want you want and deserve ...  

2. Grey's Anatomy

The Carousel Never Stops Turning

Grey's Anatomy is a wonderful, magical gem of a show!  It's about Meredith Grey working her way up from surgical intern to legit surgeon and the people she works with at Seatle Grace Hospital (AKA Seatle Grace Mercy West Hospital AKA Seatle Grace Mercy Death AKA Grey-Sloan Memeorial Hospital AKA the only hospital in the world where the surgeons are more likely to die than the patients).This show has everything you could ever want in a TV show; happiness, sadness, tragedy, death, cute couples, suspense, death, explosions, surgery, carousel metaphors, infidelity, death, eye candy and miracles.  It's a just such a good show and even after 12 seasons its still just as strong and true as it always was.  To sum up I was forced at gunpoint (just like many doctors on the show) to pay £60 for the Grey's boxset because Netflix UK has been denying me of this show, the same as denying me of a basic human right if you ask me!  It's a small price to pay to be able to step into the lives of the worlds most talented and attractive surgeons (actually it was a huge price to pay, also now I'm broke).  I basically eat, sleep and breathe Meredith Grey and co. I briefly considered applying to med school but decided to settle for just playing Mer in a home video version of Grey's which is currently underproduction and stars myself and B.  

Rating of my fave Grey's characters:

1. Meredith Grey
2. Arizona Robbins
3. Derek Shephered
4. Mark Sloan
5. Amelia Shephered
6. Callie Torres
7. Lexi Grey
8. Jackson Avery when he is part of the Plastic Posse  

Rating of the worst Grey's characters  

1. Erica Hahn (SP? WHO CARES? Of all the people to survive why her!!?)
2. The Plane that crashed that one time
3. Adele Webber (Richaaaaard Pls)
4. The truck that killed McDreamy 
5. Jo Wilson
6. Dr Burke
7. Every character during their musical numbers in that godawful musical episode

. 

Rating 10/10

Best Method of viewing Binge Watch so either Netflix US or DVDs

Fave Episode Season 6 final 2 episodes

Worst Episodes The musical episode 

Best Character Meredith Grey

Worst Character Ever = Erica Hahn. Current = Jo Wilson 

Best Couple Meredith and Derek. Callie and Arizona

2. Parks and Recreation

We all fell into the pit

Another show that Netflix UK is denying me of!  How do the ownders of Netflix even sleep at night!? (Probably on a bed of money because this is the 21st century - if you don't have a Netflix account are you even living?  Also considering everyone hates the fact that Netflix UK is pretty awful nobody can bring themselves to end their subscription, and so instead we wait and wait and wait hoping one day it will pay off and Netflix UK will be great again.  Okay so Parks and Rec is basically about Leslie Knope (who is the most adorable human beings ever) and the people she works with in the Parks department, its a documentary style sitcom like The Office.  Highlights of the show include the fact that it is set in a town that basically worships a tiny horse; Anne and Leslie gave a new meaning to friendship goals; Chris Pratt is the lead singer of a band called Mouse Rat and so much more.  The first season is a little slow but it gets better and better as each season progresses.  It's a really cute feel good show that's easy to watch and you end up caring about the characters a lot more than you initially think you will.   I started watching this show many moons ago, cant remember why I ever stopped watching it but I am 100% invested again. I only have a season left and I'm starting to mentally prepare myself to say goodbye to all of the characters

Rating 8/10

Best Method of viewing It's super easy to watch either as a binge or not.  

Fave Episode Undecided as I haven't finished the show yet - However the telethon episode                          was fun as was every episode with a town meeting... Basically TBC.

Worst Episodes Something from season 1

Best Character Chris Trager?  Again TBC

Worst Character Crazy Ira and The Douche (Just found them so annoying) 

Best Couple Andy and April, Ben and Leslie and Chris and Anne.

3. The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

They alive dammit it's a miracle 

It's basically about this girl (Kimmy) who was kidnapped and kept underground for 15 years living as part of a cult who being rescued and adapting to life in New York City.  With her childlike wonder and enthusiasm she meets lots of fun people and gets into random situations.  Its a super stupid show with an average first episode but it really does improve and I couldn't stop watching.  The show is 100% quotable and introduced the world to two of the most catchy songs that have ever existed: Pinot Noir and The theme tune.  There is only one season out so far, and god bless all that is holy it's even on Netflix UK, so it is definitely worth the watch.  There isn't too much more to say about this show because you kind of have to watch it to understand the hype.

Rating 7.5/10

Best Method of viewing Weekend (or one day) binge.  

Fave Episode Probably Kimmy Goes To School because Piot Noir

Worst Episodes The First One

Best Character I Like Kimmy, Lillian and Mrs Voorhees

Worst Character Maybe  Xanthippe Voorhees 

Best Couple N/a

4. SNL

I made left one extra hole for it's hopes and dreams

Okay So I don't Legit watch SNL but I have gone through a phase of like binge watching SNL clips on Youtube and found some firm faves.  B and I tend to differ on which ones we like as I am a big fan of kristen Wiig's charcters Sue and Penelope whereas she just found them annoying.  Firm fave clips that I would recommend everyone to watch are:

• High School Theater Show with Elizabeth Banks
• The Real Housewives of Disney
• Being Quirky with Zooey Deschanel 
• Taylor Swift's roommate clip and parent driver's clip
• The Ryan Gosling clip about being abducted by aliens where he has a breakdown.

5. How I Met Your Mother

Haaaaaaave you met Ted?

 I want to clarify that I still love How I Met Your Mother but I dont want to go into it too much because I already spoke about it in my last post.  Basically it is the best comedy show there has ever been - yes even better than Friends and that is a truth fact!  It's about a man in 2030 telling his kids the story of his life in New York living with his friends and all the decisions he made that led him to meeting their mother.  I am also a solid supporter of the shows finale and I think the show might even be better than salmon and cream cheese bagels.

Rating 10/10

Best Method of viewing All day every day (but as a binge first time round).  

Fave Episode So hard to choose! Maybe Sandcastles In The Sand?

Worst Episodes The from the final season that was set during one slap...

Best Character IRobin Scherbatsky(AKA Robin Sparkles), Ted Mosby and Marshall           Erikson

Worst Character Maybe Zooey or Stella because they are evil 

Best Couple Ted and Robin, Robin and Barney and Lily and Marshall.  

 

Film

1.The Walk

He alive dammit it's a miracle

This film tells the true story of how great CGI and one man's love for wire walking resulted in a movie scene which almost gave my dearest mother who is terrified of heights a panic attack... I can't remember the last time I wanted someone to come down from a wire so badly.  It's a really great film that is completely worth committing 2 hours of your life to because the second half which focuses on how Phillipe Petit and friends attempy to illegally rig a wire between the twin towers so he can do the worlds most dangerous wore walk.   I was 100% invested in this film, I completely forgot that it was cgi, I screamed multiple times and I remembered how much I love Joseph Gordon Levitt. 9/10 - would recommend.

Honourable mentions worth a shout out are:

• How To Get Away With Murder
• Deadpool

The moral of the story is you don't kick a dressage horse after a failed pas de deux

Until next time

xoxo

Queen G

Things I'm Lovin' Right Now

Heyyyyyaaaaa.  So I'm back, I'm blogging and I'm boogieing.  I thought I would talk about some of the things that I am loving right now, and let me tell you this:  there are an infinite amount of things that this gal loves but only a few lucky contenders will be making it onto the list.  

Netflix addiction summed up in 1 gif

1. With the weather already turning to a dismal mess and university due dates looming closer and closer I have found myself becoming increasingly distracted with, arguably, the number one thing that I am loving right now:  Netflix and chill lol jk nobody loves me.  There is a drastic difference between being in a committed relationship with your Netflix account and having an actual obsessed, crazy, addiction.  It will probably come as no surprise to hear that my current relationship with my Netflix is the latter and as of late I have found myself viewing TV late into the night and then rolling over first thing in the morning and starting all over again.  I have all of the symptoms of addiction and after doing some extensive research on Lookatyourdrinking.com (lol what dissertation?) I have come to realize that by substituting the word drink with Netflix every now and then the webpage could have been written about me:

1. Tolerance - You're able to drink binge watch episodes more and more, and you need more to get the same effect.
2. You drink watch more episodes for longer than you planned to (loss of control)
3. More and more of your time is taken up by drinking watching Netflix and recovering from drinking watching Netflix.
4. You have fewer or no more social contacts life and you work and enjoy leisure activities less or not at all due to drinking watching Netflix

I promised myself after my last relapse (the great Orange Is The New Black addiction of 2014, closely following the infamous Gossip Girl addiction of the same year) that I would never let myself get this way again.  I carefully distanced myself from Netflix for a while, I went outside and breathed in the fresh air and reminded myself of what it meant to be alive.  I watched Grey's Anatomy and How I Met Your Mother while carefully alternating between shows just as I started to care about one of them and it worked like magic for a while until

When the obsession hits hard

one day I began the next episode of How I Met Your Mother and then BOOM!! just like that it hit me... I cared! It all happened so quickly and took me by such surprise because I am usually so emotionless, dark and twisty (shout out to Meredith Grey) and uncaring.  But I could not deny it and before I knew it I cared so much.  And so I have baracaded myself in my room and binged just about 3 seasons of HIMYM (that's how the cool kids type it) in little more than 2 weeks.  It's not my fault that I care more about those fun friends than my dissertation, maybe if my dissertation was abundant in fun catch phrases, running jokes, Canadian teen pop sensations and adorkably adorable guys then I would have made more progress but as it stands just now How I Met Your Mother sits at the top of my list of things I want to do with my day and my dissertation sits around 3 from the bottom - beating out only punching Taylor Swift in the face (I WOULD NEVER!) and killing myself.  

Anyway, the positives from this situ are that I have been able to compile a list of ways to make my life more like a sitcom and I have found a fun Halloween costume for 2015 - Robin Sparkles, eh!

Stepping into Halloween 2015 like "Lets go to the mall, eh!"

bagels.  I cannot stop eating bagels.

2. So one day I woke up and realized that a part of my soul had died.  I came to this conclusion after I realized that I just wasn't feeling my homemade soup anymore (what the fuck right!?).  I just wasn't all about that soup life anymore and it was because I had found a new love.  As one door closes another opens and in this case it was a big ole bag of bagels behind the new door.  I don't know when I decided bagels were the new hip, fun and cool lunch in town but I fell hard for the bagels and after stealing a couple from the old flatmates I finally made my first ever bagel purchase today.  Perhaps I became such a bagel enthusiast when I decided to change my personality.  I decided I needed guidelines for how I was going to live out my life as a newly independent, unemotional  and (as always) dark and twisty muthafucka.  I drew a spider diagram split into 6 sections: 

1. Personality traits to keep (Including fun, funky, popular, cool, scheming)
2. Personality traits to ditch (Including needy, codependent, caring too much about certain things)
3. Things to do (including buying a fun hat, blog more, accept that I can be alone, take a break from making soup, write a song...)
4. Things to don't (including let people see you cry, seek out the company of others 24/7, ask for help writing your song)
5. Potential new catch phrases (including "Oh calamity!" "Look at the Haim!" "Is that the Haim already?"
6. Potential new interests ( Including Bagels, baking, tennis, grave robbing, poetry and the ducks... like feed them more and talk about them and stuff)

dark and twisty, dark and cloudy, and the namesake of Tays first cat!

I just love cats.

I decided I would channel some of my favourite female protaganists:

• Alice from Alice In Wonderland (what a curious little devil and she owned a cat)
• Hermione Granger (Get all studious and stuff, so far this hasn't worked.  Also she owned a cat)
• Robin Sherbatsky (Spend more time focusing on my career and myself and being more IDGAF, eh! She owned a dog but still)
• Blair Waldorf (Every day I ask myself: what would Blair Waldorf do?  Be the best thats what she would do! Had a cat in the books)
• Meredith Grey (Dark and twists init! Namesake of Tays cat)
• Holly Golightly (she had a cat and shit and if there is one thing I love in this world it is cats!!!  I love cats so much.  I could talk about cats all day.  I.  Love.  Cats!)

So to sum up... the point is I love bagels now

3. Music is like food for the soul (Queen G., 2015. youcancallmequeeng.blogspot.co.uk [Online]).  

rocking it

The only thing better than music is free music!  So recently I have been lovin' Spotify and all my new fun playlists: Shirley Bushy, Snoop Zebra, Fourth Year Get Psyched Mix... the list goes on but I shall not!).  Anyhoo, I have been thoroughly enjoying Saint Motel - My Type is especially #relatable ("You know you're just my type, you got a pulse and you are breathing" I feel ya, I love boys, I am so alone).  I've been enjoying a bit of Frank Sinatra also, what a guy!

It's hella fun browsing the different mood sections and coming across songs that I had forgotten existed, especially ones that make me feel nostalgic and shit.  If I had to give a song recommendation it would have to be Magnets by Lorde though, I have repeated myself until I'm blue in the face but I'll say it again: Lorde is far sillier than you would first imagine!  One day I would like to commit my day, and maybe even my life, to our Lorde and saviour and have her teach me the ways of a New Zealand teen pop sensation.  Perhaps one day I can meet all of the teen pop sensations of the world and start a band.  They can sing the theme tune for my new TV show I would like to produce: Wine Moms who all look similar and solve crimes together (starring Olivia Benson, Fiona Bruce, Eleanor Waldorf and Veronica Hastings and guest starring L's mum Cazzz because although she doesn't look like them she gives of just the right cool, calm, collected and terrifying vibe as the other ladies.)

dem moves

I no longer know where I am going with this blog post or my life so I'm going to say a sorrowful "goodbye" and an enthusiastic "I'll see you soon" because that's it from this very unfocused blog post.

The moral of the story is that at the mall having fun is what it's all aboot.

Until next time

xoxo,

Queen G!

Feminists: Yea Or Neigh

Okay so I'm going for a fun new font just to shake things up a bit, I know, I know I am one cray-zeeee mufuckka.  

Anyway as of late certain news articles, yik yak posts and celebrity interviews have got me thinking about all kinds of important things... one of the big topics buzzing around on the internet is feminism and let me tell you this: people are very opinionated on this topic.  

I just want to point out that this post is like focusing on extreme feminism: you know, the type: the free bleeding, nipple exposing types of feminists that are constantly clogging up social media because it is always the overly opinionated it tend to get noticed most.  

So I'm just going to say it:  feminism is a bit of a joke isn't it?  

#Controversial 

Let me explain why.  So feminism is meant to be focused around equality and women's rights but like honestly it just seems like most of the time it's just an excuse for people to grab a torch and pitchfork and recreate that scene from the start of Shrek.  And once these people get started you literally cannot say anything without offending them!  

This is the part where you run away

I 100% agree with the ideas behind feminism but at the same time, as someone who sails through life with an IDGAF attitude it's just hard you know.  I personally am all about the lols, I am not easily offended and I think that is why I have such a hard time with feminism.  You can't joke about a girl being a #sluuuut without being chastised for 'slut shaming'.  You can't want a guy to hold the door open for you or want to be a stay at home mum without being judged.  Honestly, yes there are problems out there relating to equality but as far as the crazy go-hard-or-go-home approach to not offending anyone is concerned I think this has less to do with gender issues and more to do with that fact that some people are just kind of dicks.  

And what is with feminists hating on everything men do?  Like literally what is the point in pretending guys don't have problems too?  Ignoring the problems works in some situations.  For example: to strengthen friendships according to L (although I think this is stupid), when you don't have enough money for a pizza but you buy one anyway or when one of your fave shows is going downhill but you have nothing else to watch.  But ignoring that fact that things aren't perfect for the #lads out there just because you think men are the nefarious spawn of Satan is just another reason why hardcore feminism is 12/10 on the annoying scale.  
Feminism is mean to promote the idea that women can be whatever they want to be so if a woman wants to be co-dependent or doesn't want to be a feminist at all then shouldn't that be supported?

I mean it's kind of true

I just seems like some of these people are playing a bit of a victims role, like half of your problems are either A) society issues rather than gender issues or B) due to your lack of personality or you know C) not even problems at all.  

I'm not saying that things are perfect or that maybe some things could change but what I am saying is that some guys and girls say nasty things about women's looks/sexual habits/abilities etc and some guys or girls do the exact same thing to men too.  Yes society has set extremely high expectations on woman, mostly on their looks.  But on the flip side guys have extremely high expectations set on being manly or on their jobs/earning.  And if feminists are trying to have woman viewed as more than just their looks (which i do agree with) then isn't that also kind of increasing the pressure on woman too, like now woman feel like they need to be more independent and like they have something to prove etc.

It's time for life advice

Basically yes I can see the the positive sides to feminism to an extent, yes this post focuses on the extremes and looks at the negatives more than the positives but can't we all just agree that sometimes life sucks regardless of your gender.  Lets spend less time complaining about the problems and more time enjoying ourselves because in like 100 years its pretty much guaranteed that everyone reading this article will be dead regardless.

The moral of the story is when you look at the face of evil, evils gonna look right back at you.

Evil will do that to you, it will do it every time

The moral of the story is also why nay when you can neigh!

Sassy pony

xoxo
Queen G

(disclaimer: I wrote this for the lols, don't know how to write about anything serious, I cant read)

10 Reason Why Spirit Is #Relatable

Boom bitches, I'm back.  So lately B and I have been making our way through our long list of starbuck lovers no I mean ex-lovers ugh third time lucky, our long list of movies we need to watch together.  The last film we watched was Spirit - which for those who haven't seen it I'll just let you know that it really is an emotional roller coaster.  Before watching this film we worried it would fail to meet our high expectations because before Spirit we had watched Shrek 1 and Shrek 2 and lets be real those films really are hard acts to follow!! 

I soon realised that where Spirit is lacking in humour it makes up in relatablitiy and I'll explain why below.

1.  Spirit was born.  I was born (not in a field surrounded by my mothers closest friends but I was born nonetheless)
2. He is the definition of #HairGoals

Because you're worth it

3. Anddddd #eyebrowgoals

Cara DelaNeigh

4. Like any other youngun he has hormonal urges, I mean one look into Rain's eyes and he knew that he wanted her, he wanted all of her, forever, him and Rain, every day.

An apple for the lady

5. He looked longingly out of the train window imagining a sad movie scene playing out on front of him.  Who hasn't done that when a sad song came on while they were travelling.
6. When he thought he saw his eagle friend but it was just a random eagle.  Like we have ALL been there!  Thinking you see someone you know and you wave or say hi or tap on their shoulder... spoiler alert: it's not them!

Okay this eagle was actually his friend but...

7. He appreciated the genious of Bryan Adams, and he protested to his kidnapping whilst listening to the song 'You Cant Take Me I'm Free'.  I think we can all agree that when we were growing up we had (or still have) that song that we feel just gets us, on a spiritual level.
8. He is such a sass monster, a real #lad.  If Spirit was a human he would be a chino wearing, cheeky Nandos eating, T In The Park attending, honda civic driving after 10 Jaegar Bombs (because drink driving just adds to the fun) kind of guy.  I can't say we would get along but I think he would be very attractive and, well I'll move on.

Look Shrek, I'm trottttting

8. He couldn't handle the chain.  His was an actual chain but we all know that one person who tries to be a mad rapper, 2 chainz style.  Man, whatchu gon do? Get out ma grille dawg, you gon call the po po? (I have no idea if that is how they talk, I'm too basic)
9. Also we have all felt at one time or another that everyone expects too much from us, I think Spirit felt like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders and I've been there too my friends, I've been there too!
10. Finally, Spirit had to go through some though ass punishment! 3 days tied to the pole with not food or water, poor thing poor thing! I myself have never been starved by my parents but now that I live on my own on days when the old bank funds are running low and I cant afford to eat I have been able to imagine how Spirit must have felt.

When you try you're best but you don't succeed.

The moral of the story is that life never give's you lemons.  It never gives you anything.  You have to earn things in life, you aren't entitled to no goddamn lemons!!

XOXO
Queen G